AAADD

[Chris&Kez 0]

I just wanted to let you know that I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD - Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder

 

 

I decide to do the laundry, start down the hall and notice the newspaper on the table. OK, I'm going to do the laundry...

 

BUT FIRST I'm going to read the newspaper. After that, I notice the mail on the table. OK, I'll just put the newspaper in the recycle stack...

 

BUT FIRST I'll look through the pile of mail and see if there are any bills to be paid. Yes. Now where is the checkbook? Oops...there's the empty glass from yesterday on the coffee table. I'm going to look for that checkbook...

 

BUT FIRST I need to put the glass in the sink. I head for the kitchen, look out the window, notice my poor flowers need a drink of water, I put the glass in the sink and there's the remote for the TV on the kitchen counter. What's it doing here? I'll just put it away...

 

BUT FIRST I need to water those plants. I head for the door and... Aaaagh! stepped on the cat. Cat needs to be fed. Okay, I'll put the remote away and water the plants...

 

BUT FIRST I need to feed the cat.

 

END OF DAY: Laundry is not done, newspapers are still on the floor, glass is still in the sink, bills are not paid, checkbook is still lost, and the cat ate the remote control...and, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I'm baffled because... I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY! I realize this condition is serious...I'll get help...

 

BUT FIRST...I think I'll check my e-mail.

[Andrew Ikeda 0]

Chris and Kez,

 

I certainly know about those days! I have similar days everyday!

 

Dont feel bad, I was diagnosed with loan officer AAADD and it sure as heck is depressing!

 

My life as a loan officer:

 

Alarm goes off, hit the snooze button. Goes off again, hit snooze button again. Usually 3-4 times. Get up and try to decide whether to get dressed first, brush my teeth first, take a ____ (guess) first. All this going on in my mind as I try to open my eyes to see where I'm going.

 

Go to office and check email. Then check on the client in Quincy, WA struggling to buy a duplex in the middle of nowhere because there are no comps and the appraiser says there is nothing recent. Then call lenders like mad to see what I can find...cant find anything. They all ask the pertinent question "Where the hell is Quincy, WA?" I calmly tell them that if I knew myself there would be no reason for me to call them!

 

Phone rings, another interested borrower. Asks for interest rates. I tell them anywhere from 4% to 16% depending on credit scores and what they want. Interested borrower asks again as he is not clear so I tell him if he's got excellent credit, then 4-5%, if not so good 5-6.5%, if really not so good then 6.5 - 7.5%, if really, really not so good then 7.5% - 9.5%, if really, really, really not so good then 9.5% - 13%. If its really ,really, really, really not so good 13% - 16%. Lastly, if its really, really, really, really, really not so good, he wont get any financing.

Then he asks about credit scores so I tell him if it's 800 - 850, he's second to God as far as credit goes. If between 750 - 800, I love him and will be his bestest buddy and get him a million dollar property for spare change. If between 700 - 750, I'm thrilled to have him consider doing business with me. If between 650 - 700, that's my queue that I'm going to work. 600 -650, I work double hard. 580 - 600, I work triple hard and have to encourage myself and remind myself that life is good. Below 580, I take a deep breath and try to relax and then work like crazy to find the solution to help my clients! (This part I do really mean- I love my borrowers regardless of how terrible it is).

 

Phone rings again and it's one of my co-workers asking me if I'm home. Then explains 'mentally home' - my answer: heck no, I'm never ever home!

 

I get up to go take a break and the receptionist comes over to me with mail. I open it to see it's some disclosures I sent a month ago to a couple about 3 miles from the office.

 

Then the interested borrower calls again and says he doesnt understand how I came up with the interest rates and that another lender gave him better rates. I tell him to continue shopping around and when he's tired and truth be known, to call me again when he's ready to move.

 

Then I check email again and lo and behold, I have several emails from across the country. One guy in Uzbekistan wants to by a small rural property in Nigeria. I tell him it's not worth my time and efforts because closing costs are going to eat him alive as the house is for sale at 5,020 and all closing costs are going to be around $5,000 unless he buys with an adjustable rate. The guys screams and cusses me out filthy for telling me the truth. I then try to encourage and calm him down by telling him of the great foreclosures available in Tikrit, Iraq, not to mention all the numerous 'fixers' they have over there!

 

Then the phone rings again and now it's an investor who wants to borrow money to get a lease option that he wants his son to lease option to the son's best friends father who then wants to flip it to his ex-wife so that she can pay off the foreclosure. She plans to sell it to the lawyer who plans to sell it back to her so that she can lease it to her new boyfriend who plans to lease it to his uncle until his workman's comp arrives in the mail. The uncle plans to subdivide the property (it's 3 acres) and ....... (well, you get the picture)

 

It's around 9 am.

 

My hat's off to you Chris and Kez and the people in the financing business and the military. We seem to get more done by noon than most people accomplish in a lifetime!

 

Now I'm wondering if there is a cure for loan officer AAADD?

 

Also would like to hear what other kinds of investor AAADD is out there and the cure for it!

 

Andrew

[Chris&Kez 0]

It sure is a long day here too.

And just a thought, my DEAD homes website would be a real hit in Iraq about now.

 

Regarding those Nigerian 'gentleman', I get at least 4 of those e mails a day telling me how much money they have and dont know what to do with it.

I just hit reply, and attach a link to our Real Estate Center.... at the bottom of the sympathy card I send for the deceased relative.

 

How annoyed am I when the same dudes never write back?

[Andrew Ikeda 0]

Chris and Kez,

 

Dont know about you guys but I keep telling myself that it's all for the frickin' love of real estate!!

 

Of course, it should be obvious to the serious middle eastern investor how your

DEAD homes are a 'real hit' in Iraq. I've been told that fix up costs there are relatively inexpensive and some of the better investors there have been able to pay for their gas bills and drive around with full tanks...have you heard that too?

 

For the Nigerians, I would suggest they buy hotels, banks, and other commercial real estate throughout Iraq as they too have taken a 'real hit' and there are some lucrative deals to be found there!

 

Andrew

[Chris&Kez 0]

Dont know about you guys but I keep telling myself that it's all for the frickin' love of real estate!!

 

Yeah, and they thought we were crazy huh?

All of us...yes kez, shhh, no you shhh.

 

Of course, it should be obvious to the serious middle eastern investor how your

DEAD homes are a 'real hit' in Iraq.

 

HIT being the operative word.

 

I've been told that fix up costs there are relatively inexpensive and some of the better investors there have been able to pay for their gas bills and drive around with full tanks

 

Andrew, we dont want THEM in our tanks!!

 

...have you heard that too?

Not at this point lol.

 

For the Nigerians, I would suggest they buy hotels, banks, and other commercial real estate throughout Iraq as they too have taken a 'real hit' and there are some lucrative deals to be found there!

 

Today y'all would have been so proud of me , seriousley.

I took all those Nigerian e mail addies ( how come 'we' saved them?) and sent them a complete inventory of notes I'd kept on "Lease with Option To Purchase" for the last how long....it sure was a FAT e mail, I do hope they appreciate the free advice, the next one I will be sending the account for services rendered.

 

Andrew

Kez.

ps andrew, please check your messages, & or e mil.

Ta

[Chris&Kez 0]

oops, I did it wrong, it's the AAADD sorry, by the way...Michael it was great 'meeting you' on the phone today.

K

[MichaelC 160]

Good speaking with you, too, Kez. And by the way, those Nigerian scam letters are faxes are a daily part of my day over here. Get 'em all the time, along with body part enlargement emails and body part reduction emails. If you want to play with some Nigerian scammer's head, visit a site dedicated to just that purpose: 419eater. Funny stuff, and a truly creative and warped mind that put the site together!