Paralyzed from the Neck Up

[nck-mail 0]

(Wasn't sure this is the right forum, but nothing else fit either).

 

Finished re-reading the manual and my next step is to start calling on FSBO's and FRBO's - and I'm scared to death.

 

What's worse is that I'm on the mentoring program and I'm scared to tell Michael that I didn't do anything this week (our next meeting is Thur/Fri).

 

I feel damned if I do and damned if I don't.

 

Can anyone tell me something to break through this massive glacier of fear? "Just do it" doesn't help. I'm getting physically sick over it.

 

Thanks,

Naomi

[Adam King (MI) 1]

Naomi,

Good, that means you're normal.

First off, everyone's scared. Second, the only way to get courage is to do the act that scares you and the courage follows. I don't know how to explain it, that's just the way it is.

(George Clooney, Three Kings)

 

Do what I did, do if for the experience. Remind yourself of why/what you're doing if for and use that towards your motivation. Everyone feels intimidated when they're not sure what to say, especially in this world where cold calling is taboo.

 

Rule # 1. Make what's against you for you

 

If something scares you, break it down and find out what part of it scares you and work with it. If it's simply talking to people, then you have a real problem. But if it's looking or sounding stupid because you don't know everything yet, then it's just your ego. And the ego is why people fail.

 

Try this. Make a couple of phone calls JUST to TALK to people. Tell them you're looking for a place for yourself and you are approved for a mortgage, but only have a certain loan (80 LTV etc) or less and need to find a deal. (Make yourself a loser so you wont have to worry about actually getting deal. ) Again, you are ONLY doing this to TALK to people. This will show you how easy it really is and what works best for you during YOUR presentation. It wont be long before you'll get a true motivated seller that says something like; I have been trying forever to move this darn thing and I am thinking of renting it or selling it for what I owe. BAM, you just got yourself a deal.

I can assure you the rest will become easier and easier. Some of the best investors I know are the ones that come across as knowing the least. I still wonder sometimes if they even know what they're doing, but it's now obvious to me how they pull off so many deals. It's the same thing I do now; just be yourself.

Regards,

Adam

[-Tony- 0]

Naomi,

 

Adam gave you some sound advice. I have another suggestion, try making you calls between 10am and 2pm. Most people people work during the day so, if you can get comfortable talking about what you do on there voice mail.

 

You may not get any deals but at least it gets you talking and more comfortable. I hope this helps you, it did me.

[Adam King (MI) 1]

Naomi,

Tony and I have made suggestions that I wouldn't have agreed with in the beginning because it seems like you're avoiding the objective. But I just can't say enough how cool doing "something" will feel.

I just had to add this two cents after Tony's post because I think it's a very good idea. Do it for a day, a week or however long enough it takes for you to start realizing that this is as easy as it seems.

Regards,

Adam

PS Hey, if it's this easy why doesn't everyone one do it? That's simple, no one ever does anything the easy way.....

[MichaelC 160]

(Wasn't sure this is the right forum, but nothing else fit either).

It is. After all, calling is a part of marketing. So, yeah, you're in the right place, Naomi.

Finished re-reading the manual and my next step is to start calling on FSBO's and FRBO's - and I'm scared to death.

This makes you normal. When was the last time anyone called you that?

What's worse is that I'm on the mentoring program and I'm scared to tell Michael that I didn't do anything this week (our next meeting is Thur/Fri).

You'd better hope he doesn't find out! I hear he is one mean SOB!

I feel damned if I do and damned if I don't.

You certainly are damned if you don't. You'll be stuck at the starting gate and will always look back with regrets. I guarantee it.

Can anyone tell me something to break through this massive glacier of fear? "Just do it" doesn't help. I'm getting physically sick over it.

First, you need to TADBAR*. Then, you need to write down specifically what it is that puts such an apparently deep seated fear in you. I think writing these things down, whatever they are, will be a great help in understanding and alleviating your fears. Once you have that done, PM me and I'll ring you up. I assure you I won't be pushed aside that easily, Naomi! I'm in this with you, but I need you to help me to help you...........if that makes any sense .

And, for what it's worth, I, (and probably many others on the board), would really appreciate if others can share what works/worked for them in getting over their initial fear of warm calling and speaking with sellers. It's a universal concern for newbies and it would be most helpful to read how others overcame it. Thanks, all.

 

 

 

 

*Take A Deep Breath And Relax

[Gary (MO) 0]

Hi Naomi,

I used to hate cold calling too. What helped me the most was when Michael made the point that these people actually paid money to place an ad in the paper so I would....call them!

 

For me, THAT changed things. It was no longer me "bothering" them out of the blue. It was me calling to see if I could help them with whatever problem was behind them running the ad in the first place.

 

I hope that helps you as much as it helped me.

 

Gary

[yessie 0]

Hi! what really helped me was when my sister called me to ask if I could help her find a place.

 

And that made me feel real anxious to help her out by calling the frbo/fsbos, you would have never guessed but I too was scared to death of making calls! I even fell into depression over all of this !! I haven't done a 2nd deal yet because of this but while I've been calling around I did find some private money lenders if I ever need them!

 

Plus the thought of having my sister stay with me with her 3 rugrats just isnt nice So try what I did help someone find a home, at least this will get you talking to people.

Smile,have fun!

 

yessie

[socharming1 0]

Here's my 2.5 cents

 

I have researched REI for the last year, drove neighborhoods and researched properties on the internet (eased myself into it).

 

FEAR is what has kept me back. Fear of THEM asking me a question I can't answer and then I'll look stupid and blow it.

 

FEAR that they'll know that I have little to no experience.

 

FEAR that I will actually fumble my way into a DEAL and then what?

 

I have one deal I will be closing at the end of June. Fear has held me back from finding any deals in 4 weeks.

 

I am now tired of fear and have started a letter campaign to people I see moving, to FSBO's in my farm area, I now go to "Open House" just to look at properties and talk to the agent's. When I feel comfortable and more assured, I run right home and CALL FSBO's & FRBO's.

 

IT WORKED!! I have an appt. today with foriegner's that want to return home and want to rid themselves of TH AND lonely old man offering 80% financing on big, nice house owned free and clear!

 

Once you pick up the phone and while it's ringing (remember to breathe) either the owner is going to pick up (then too late to back out) or the answering machine will pick up, practice leaving messages.

 

I hope this helps someone

[4Rmgt 0]

Naomi,

 

Just remember what Eleanor Roosevelt said:

 

"No one can make you feel inferior without your permission".

[<Steve> 82]

Naomi-

 

These FSBO ads are from folks just like you and me. They are not mean monsters. Just be yourself and explain what you know. If you get stuck on an issue ask the seller if you can check with your partner (naked investor) and you will get back with them, or move on to another topic in your conversation. If you studied well, you'll be surprized at what you've learned. Soon everything will become memorized and automatic.

 

Try it you'll be glad you did. Half the fun is getting the deal.

 

<Steve>